Small Bump
by SWACGleekFreak
Summary: AU He had missed the pain behind James's voice when he asked about their newborn baby. He had missed the looks of sympathy as he made his way towards the hospital room. When he reached the room, everything suddenly became clear. Kames


**I wrote this after putting on tumblr that I wanted to write something fluffy and cute for Kames. Obviously, this is neither of those things. Yeah, things don't turn out the way I want them sometimes. **

**Well, hope you enjoy **

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Kendall waited by the phone anxiously, just hoping that any minute now it would just start ringing. He had been sitting there in his office for what seemed to be hours now, just waiting for that phone call that he knew would be arriving soon. He didn't want to leave his position, knowing that if he got up to get something to drink or something to eat that he would miss the call.

He just wished he could be there to see it happen, but thanks to some stupid work thing he was forced to miss it, leaving him to just wait for the phone call and rush as quickly as he could to the hospital.

He had been waiting for this day since nine months ago, when James came into their room saying that finally, after long nights of worrying, that the surrogate that they had picked was pregnant with their son or daughter. It had been the greatest day of Kendall's life, and that day he swore that he had never felt so happy. (Well, minus the day that James proposed to him, because hey, the sex afterwards made him pretty damn happy)

He was about to get up and rush to the bathroom, because holding it in for two hours was beginning to hurt, when the phone rang. His heart began pounding as he slid his thumb across the screen to answer the call from James, announcing that their child was here, alive, and ready to be loved by his or hers two fathers.

"So, is it a boy or a girl?" was the first thing out of Kendall's mouth when he answered the phone. He didn't hear the hesitation in his fiancé's voice, nor did he notice that hitch in James's voice when he replied that Kendall needed to come to the hospital immediately. He was bursting with joy as he hung up the phone and put on his jacket before grabbing the car keys and running to the parking garage in his office building. In less than 30 minutes he was at Cedars Sinai, asking which room his surrogate was.

"Room 342 sweetie," the nurse replied. "Are you sure that you want to go in there right now though?" she sounded sad, which Kendall didn't quite understand. Wasn't child birth a wonderful, happy thing? He just nodded and ran towards the elevators, going up to the right floor before tearing down the hallway.

The first thing he saw was the doctor outside the room, looking solemn. "Excuse me Doctor, is this Ms. Taylor's room?"

The doctor turned to look at Kendall before sadness etched his face. "You must be Mr. Knight, we've been waiting for you to arrive to tell you the news…"

Now Kendall had slowed himself down to see what was in front of him. The doctor wasn't happy about the announcement, he actually looked tearful. The nurse hadn't been so happy either. Kendall turned away from the man and entered the room, where Jo, the surrogate, and James were. Jo was sobbing, and James looked like he was on the verge of breaking down.

"I got here as soon as I could," Kendall said, walking over to James and taking his husband's face into his hands. His husband's eyes were red and swollen, as if he had already cried enough. A tear drop rolled down the man's face, Kendall wiping it away with his thumb. "What happened James, why are you so upset?"

"Kendall," he said, almost in a whisper. "Our baby….our baby…." He wrapped his arms around Kendall, sobbing into his neck as he cried the next words. Kendall felt his heart still in his chest, and he gripped James tighter. Tears now slid down his cheeks, but all he could feel was numb.

The next couple of hours were hard. Kendall tried to listen as the doctor explained what exactly still birth was, and that 25,000 babies were stillborn each year in the U.S, but he couldn't focus at all. James was by his side, squeezing his hand and assuring Kendall that everything was going to be alright, that they could get through this, but Kendall wanted to know _how. _

They arrived home at three in the morning, both of them tired from all the crying done at the hospital. It still didn't seem real. Kendall liked to think he was in some kind of nightmare, that he had fallen asleep at work and that his baby had been born with no complications and all he had to do was wake up and go to the hospital. It was when he walked past the nursery in his and James's apartment that he had realized that he was living in a horrible reality.

He laid in bed that night, wrapped up in James's arms, and began crying. This wasn't fair. Why did it have to be their baby? After all the struggle they went through, they came out on the losing end. Jo had kept saying that it was all her fault, that she must have done something wrong during the pregnancy that caused this, but Kendall and James kept insisting it wasn't her. She had done everything right, and they were grateful for that.

James felt something wet on his chest and woke up to see his fiancé sobbing into it. While he was all cried out, Kendall still had all the built up emotion inside. James wrapped his arms around his love tighter, letting Kendall cry as much as he wanted. James kissed his hair, whispering to him, "Let it out babe, just let it out."

The next day they took down most of the things in the nursery, even dismantled the crib and placed it in their storage unit. There was more crying, more questions as to why it had to be them that had to be so unlucky to have a still born.

Sympathy calls came pouring in over the day, and James found them repetitive. It was always the same thing over and over again: "We are so sorry, just call us if you need anything." Sometimes James just felt like replying with, "Bring my baby back."

He knew that wasn't possible.

Months passed, and while the pain had lessened, there was still that feeling in both Kendall and James's chests as they passed the room that was once a nursery to their lost child. It lingered there until they were completely out of the apartment and as far away from that room as possible. Kendall found himself wondering if the pain would ever really go away. He would pass women with their babies on the street and try not to break down. It was just so _hard. _

It was about six months after the loss that they got a phone call from Jo, their old surrogate. She had wanted to see how they were, if they were healing. It was then when she brought up something that had Kendall confused.

"I want to surrogate for you guys again," she said, sounding sure of herself. "You didn't deserve what happened before, and if anyone deserves a second chance at parenthood, it's you two. I've never seen two people so suited for raising a child. So, what do you say?"

Kendall swallowed. "I'll have to speak to James about it. I have to ask though, why are you so willing to do this again?"

"Like I said before," Jo replied. "If anyone in this world needs a child, it's you and James. I want to be the person to do just that."

"What if it's another still birth?" Kendall asked, the words 'still' and 'birth' almost making him choke up. It was still a fresh wound, even after so long. "James and I can't handle that pain again Jo, please understand that."

"I know Kendall," Jo sighed. "Trust me on this one. I have a good feeling about it."

After James came home from work, Kendall told him about the phone call from Jo. James was hesitant, asking questions similar to the ones Kendall had asked Jo. By the end of the night, Kendall and James decided that maybe they should try again, and hope for the best.

Nine months later, smiles were all around as Carter Kenneth Knight-Diamond was born into the world, healthy and alive. At that moment, Kendall told himself that nothing, not even honeymoon sex, would trump this moment as what he now dubbed, _the _happiest moment in his life.


End file.
